But late one night, in a parking lot after we had spent an angry hour talking on the phone, I made a decision that I would later consider an act of mercy for both of us: I would never speak to him again — and didn't. When I finally told him the truth, answering his oft-asked inquiries about my infidelity with a final, fateful yes, we remained locked in a toxic back-and-forth, shouting insults at each other for a month.This time I absolutely understood it and soon after felt a similar wave of relief.And the sting of foolishness as I remembered the hours spent with friends evaluating what was now painfully obvious.Now they are not my actual friends but I did spend 30 minutes with them on July 13, 2003 when this phrase was uttered.
This period of courtship is sometimes seen as a precursor to engagement or marriage.The protocols and practices of dating, and the terms used to describe it, vary considerably from country to country and over time.While the term has several meanings, the most frequent usage refers to two or more people exploring whether they are romantically or sexually compatible by participating in dates with the other.Until about six months ago, when my phone buzzed with a text message from a name I never expected to see on my screen again: “Do you want to get coffee? I needed to tell him I was sorry, he needed to tell me how much I had hurt him, and we both needed to hug. Sure, he may have technically had more options than me — he was drawn to men and women, while I was only drawn to men — but that didn’t make him any more promiscuous or untrustworthy than the next guy.And since this week is Bisexual Awareness Week, and I’m feeling sentimental, I’m reflecting on the lessons that relationship taught me, and the ways I learned from him — because my ex-boyfriend was bisexual. The reality was far from it: He was unbearably monogamous and loyal to a fault.