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One of my male relatives brought home a date for Thanksgiving who could have been Barbie's twin sister.

She was blonde, thin, big-bosomed, and even had a Germanic name.

But I've never dated someone of my own ethnicity: Mexican. And I would say Colombian, but that courtship never blossomed into much after he came over my house and serenaded me with his acoustic guitar. Time and again, after being introduced to a black guy I was dating, my mother either let out heavy sighs or foretold my future under her breath. My dad used his seasonal, strictly temporary passport for work and came to Arizona to pick fruit.Two of my younger male relatives have recently been engaged to white women, and one tied the knot last summer.This is a pattern that I have observed in my professional life for years: successful black men pairing up with white women, but now that the practice has come home to roost, so to speak, I cannot help but admit to feeling a bit demoralized.If OKCupid’s studies are anything to go by, black men gave black women the cold shoulder too and vice versa.A recent study found that black people of all ages were 10 times more likely to initiate contact with white people than other black people.